Showing posts from August, 2015

Candles lit. Glasses raised.

Today has been a shitty, heartbreaking day. Actually the last few weeks have been rather shit. The kind of shittiness that makes you wonder whether you should pray or drink. The kind that makes you question what or if you believe anything at all.

Today was shit. So I had my nails done. Painted a garish, glittery silver. I cried without my make-up smudging (thanks Smashbox). Then cried until it did. I had a bath. I had a glass of wine. And I lit some candles and prayed.

I'm not Catholic. I'm not 100% sure how the candle lighting thing works. But tonight I lit them.

I lit a candle for every one of the people I love who lost someone (or is busy saying goodbye). A parent, a grand parent, a family member, an unborn child. It doesn't matter what other people say. It doesn't matter what the reasons are. It doesn't matter what the doctors say, or nature, or the internet.  The why's don't matter. The hurt does. It's real. It is overwhelming. And it is fcking awf…